B.Y.O.N.P. (Bring Your Own Nail Polish–Really!!)
“Nail Polish.”
–Jennifer Lopez (when asked what she got on her SAT’s)
It’s a dirty little secret (literally!) here in the Washington D.C. metro area: the nail polish selection at the vast majority of nail salons is sad, indeed. Sure, the polish selection at my hair salon is fantastic, but dropping forty dollars or so for an acrylic fill-in and polish just seems a bit ridiculous—even by my standards! (And, by the way, what is it with this area, that the hair salons usually have a far better selection of nail polishes than the nail salons? Aren’t these places, by definition, salons that specialize in nails?)
So there I am: sitting in a tiny shop, located in a strip mall, somewhere in NOVA. My search for a nail technician in the DC metro area has, once again, proved fruitless. “I just want to find a nail technician I can really connect with, you know?” I often say, when lamenting about my search. The blank stares I receive in return assure me that most other women I’ve met here, in fact, do not know. Now, it’s the night before a big meeting, and my nails resemble those of a recovering meth addict! So, I’ve done what smart, successful women must never do (except when faced with the possibility of attending a big meeting with un-manicured nails): I’ve settled. I’ve settled on Nails R-Us or whatever this place is. I am sitting in a dirty chair in a little store in a strip mall–waiting for “my turn”. I look up at a board featuring fake nails with Christmas tree designs painted on them, and mutter to myself, “God help me…”
The technician finally works on my nails, and finishes filing. I wash my hands, and she actually speaks to me for the first time: “You pick color!” she orders. I immediately scurry over to a wall unit marked “Nails Poleshs,” and that’s when it hits me: I forgot to bring my own polish again! I have no other choice (well, there are those Chirstmas tree designs . . . ); I browse the sad collection: OPI Red (I really didn’t want to go red), a few very old looking bottles of OPI in dark wine and brown colors (too dark), and then a large selection of that odd, “no name” polish I’ve encountered in every salon since I’ve been in DC. These bottles are mostly primary colors—I start naming them myself, in honor of OPI’s penchant for naming polishes after locales. A dried-up bottle of what I think should be called “Crack House Red” sits appropriately beside the new “Prison Jumpsuit Orange”—snazzy! To add insult to injury (and really, is there anything worse than insult being added to injury?) there are also bottles of Revlon and Maybelline here! Clearly, some poor woman left behind her favorite Maybelline Peony Pink, and these people just figured it was part of their regular selection! “You pick color!” my technician commands again. “Great,” I think, “the nail nazi!” I finally decide on a pale cream/gold. It was far more horrifying than it sounds, I assure you. (What was I thinking? Had I suffered a near-breakdown in the midst of this “parade of polish horribles”?) Smudging four nails on the way home hardly mattered, once I took a look at my nails and realized I looked like an homage to the “Solid Gold Dancers”! Not surprisingly, I entered the meeting sans polish the next day!
Following the “solid gold nails” disaster, I vowed to always bring my own nail polish! I learned a valuable lesson sporting my “solid gold” nails that day: next time, I’ll bring my own nail polish! That same week, I learned that Zoya nail polish is available for order online, direct from the manufacturer at www.zoya.com! If you haven’t heard of Zoya, you are in for a treat! I first encountered Zoya several years ago at a gorgeous salon, and was drawn to it not just because of the product’s focus on health (Zoya nail polish is Toluene, Formaldehyde and DBP free), but primarily because the colors were amazing! I adore that their polishes (made in the USA!) are packaged in Italian glass bottles (Italy being the site of my recent honeymoon!) with fine Spanish brushes! You can purchase Zoya by the single bottle or in sampler sets of six .05 oz. bottles, and shipping is free for orders over $55! I am definitely ordering some Zoya sets! Those .05 oz bottles are perfect to drop in my purse the day of my next fateful nail salon visit!
